If I were speaking with you in person, I would begin this review by skipping up to you in a glittery homemade duct-tape strap-on harness, unicorn-horn shaped dick bouncing up and down in it’s gleaming holster, brandishing the Split Peaches Rivetor as a wand, and probably wearing those dollar-store fairy wings on my back. Unfortunately, this picture below will have to suffice.
The Split Peaches Unicorn Horn and Rivetor are two toys I was sent with the intention of sticking them up my partner’s bum. I just rewrote my twitter and instagram bios to include the term “pegging princess”, and I am feelin’ pretty stinkin’ good about it. Unfortunately though, neither of these toys ended up being used regularly in Simon’s butt.
The Unicorn Horn
This is the dildo I proudly display to threesome buddies saying “Lookie what I’ve got!”. Of course I’m going to wave it in the faces of everyone I know. I just wish this thing was as fun to actually use as it is to show off.
The small Unicorn Horn measures 6″ in total length (5.5″ insertable), 1.5″ at the base of the shaft, and just under an inch at the tip of the shaft, with a rounded tip for easy entry. It’s made entirely of firm, swirly white pearlescent silicone, and has a round flared base for anal and harness use. Mine is in white, but you can also get one in rainbow, pastel rainbow, or metallic blue and purple.
The problem with the Unicorn Horn is that while it’s fun to wear and it’s looks may stimulate your brain, it doesn’t really do anything for the actual holes you put it in. It’s a unicorn horn, so there’s no curve whatsoever and very little texture, which makes it sort of… boring. In the butt, the ripples feel kinda nice. Since it’s the small, it’s a good size for a booty beginner, but even then I’d recommend something more curved like the Tantus Sport. In the vagina however, it doesn’t really feel like anything. Its too small to feel filling, and too straight to give any G-Spot stimulation, so I’m just left with the thought of “oh, there’s something in there I guess… That’s cool.” It’s the vaginal equivalent of the -__- expression.
I despised this thing at first. Initially, we stuck it in Simon’s butt, where it was hella painful. Then, we tried it in my vag without a warm-up, where it was again hella painful. I tossed it aside in fear for about a month, and then with newfound courage, tried it again after a lengthy warm-up with larger toys. Somehow this time it worked. Fairly nicely in fact.
I am far from a size queen, and this was destined for Simon’s butt anyway, so this is the size extra-small (it also comes in small, medium, and large). It’s got an insertable length of just 5.5″, a shaft diameter of 1.2″, and a bumpy head diameter of 1.4″. Although I must say it somehow looks smaller than it is. Like the Unicorn Horn, it is also completely made of firm silicone. I believe the extra-small only comes in silver, but the other sizes of the Rivetor come in rainbow, bronze, metallic green, and a gorgeous plum color. The toy is entirely covered in bumps, and features an extra-bumpy head. Texture sluts, rejoice!
The key feature of the Rivetor is obviously the intense bumpy texture, and the firmness of the silicone ensures that you feel it. I need to be warmed up with toys larger than this one before I use it to avoid pain, but after that lengthy warm-up those bumps feel absolutely delightful rubbing up against my G-spot. Funnily enough, while I thought the Unicorn Horn was too straight, I found the Rivetor to be too curved. That slight curve allows the pointy tip to scrape the vagina and while it isn’t painful, it’s a bit uncomfortable and distracts from the good feeling of the bumps. Although the pointy tip and curve contribute to the overall aesthetic of the toy, I wish one aspect weren’t so apparent.
The Split Peaches Rivetor and Unicorn Horn are really cool-looking toys. The Rivetor ($35 at Split Peaches) is great for texture lovers, but not sensitive orifices, and the Unicorn Horn ($38 at Split Peaches or Shevibe) is more of a looker than a doer. Despite that downside, I get to say I’ve fucked my boyfriend in the butt with a unicorn horn, and how many people get to say that?