Squeaky Bedsprings Posts

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I have many aspirations: move to somewhere I love, eventually get a college degree, work in a feminist sex shop for a bit, die happy. You know, the usual. I have life goals, and then I have sex goals. Neither are coming easily at the moment. I live in a rather small house with my parents and siblings. The upstairs bedrooms are all connected, meaning my brother has to walk through my room to get to his own room. Translation: I cannot masturbate nearly as often as I need to, nor can Simon and I fuck when he comes to visit. When we can fuck, it’s a quick, silent session sans toys or roleplay or anything “extra”. It’s good, but I want more. Thanks to my fairly creative, active, and sexually-starved brain, here’s some stuff that is totally going to happen once Simon moves into his new apartment and I come to visit.

Other Writing

New Blogger Worries

Dear Me,

You’ve been blogging for just over two months now: months that have both flown by and dragged on. You have already learned so much about blogging, and even more about sex. You’ve received your first toy for review (thank you Funkit Toys!), made some friends, and virtually interacted with so many cool people. You can now help someone find a dildo shaped like Lebron James, or a unicorn horn, or a light saber. Although you still don’t have a blogging niche, your posts have already begun to change a little and improve. Some days you feel on top of the world, but most others, you feel entirely inadequate, irrelevant, and worthless. This is for you to read on those days. 

Other Writing

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Lelo has made some abhorrent decisions lately surrounding their latest project, Lelo Hex Condoms. Not only did they choose a man known for assault as their spokesperson and stigmatize STIs to sell their product, they defended all these choices and refused to listen to the blogging and sex-ed community. Sarah from Marvelous Darling does a much better job of articulating this than I could, so you should definitely read into the details here. Because of this fiasco, Lelo, and their other brand, Picobong, no longer hold my respect. That being said, their recent actions did not influence this review, they only left me bitter that I still had to actually report about this unfortunate toy. 

Reviews Vibrators

sliquid bottlesSliquid is my favorite brand of lubricant. Loved dearly by sex-toy aficionados like Epiphora and Erika Moen of Oh Joy Sex Toy, Sliquid must be one of the most popular lubricants among bloggers, and it’s easy to see why. Sliquid lubes are comprised of only a few ingredients, and all of them are both vegan and body safe. There are no chemical irritants, parabens (potentially carcinogenic), glycerin, or propylene glycol (both of which can lead to heightened risk of STI transmission). Sliquid lubes are iso-osmotic, meaning they are kind to your skin and tissue cells. They also have a friendly pH relative to the environment of the vagina or rectum, which translates to no burning feeling. If you’d like to learn more about osmolality, pH, and the science of lube, check out Dangerous Lilly’s Big Lube Guide

Reviews

talk after sex

In a good book, the story has an introduction, rising action, climax, falling action, and a conclusion. Sex should be no different! Good sex should have the introduction of consent, the rising action of increased arousal and pleasure, and the climax of, well, climax. The classic film portrayal of two people in bed breathing heavily seems to be decent falling action, but what many people don’t see in their sex lives is a good conclusion. My favorite way to “conclude” sex is with a quality conversation about what just happened. For people who practice BDSM and kink, this can be considered a type of aftercare, but even vanilla-identifying folks can benefit from talking about their just-finished sexcapade. Communication with your sex-buddy in general will improve your romps by leaps and bounds, but the conversation can be even better when what just happened is still fresh in your minds. These tips are mostly tailored to those having recurring sex with someone, whether they are dating, friends with benefits, hooking up, or any other sort of sex-buddy. 

Guides Writing

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In high school, I was the only one on my basketball team who failed to score all season. I played three soccer games in a row where I got hit in the face every single time. When I tried hockey, other people got awards like “Fastest Skater” or “Best Backwards”. I got “Smallest Head”. Sports and I were never compatible. That is, until now. Luckily, you don’t have to be athletic to enjoy the Tantus Sport

Butt Stuff Dildos

Showerhead masturbationPeople discover masturbation in various ways. Some touch or rub their genitals against something and realize “hey this feels good!”, some copy what they see in porn, some hear about it from friends, and some like me have no idea masturbation exists until their new boyfriend’s fingers have been innocently jammed up their vagina in all the wrong ways and they’ve turned to the internet for guidance. May is national masturbation month, and after reading Emmeline Peaches’ story of masturbation, I decided to share my own story in honor of this celebration of self-pleasure. 

Other Writing

Elust 82 Header
Photo courtesy of Teachers Have Sex

Welcome to Elust #82

The only place where the smartest and hottest sex bloggers are featured under one roof every month. Whether you’re looking for sex journalism, erotic writing, relationship advice or kinky discussions it’ll be here at Elust. Want to be included in Elust #83 Start with the rules, come back June 1st to submit something and subscribe to the RSS feed for updates!

 

~ This Month’s Top Three Posts ~

Take Me

How Do I Love Thee:On Comparing Relationships

Asking all the questions…

 

 

~ Featured Post (Molly’s Picks) ~

Erotic Fiction: Fishnet Queen

I Manage My Expectations

~Readers Choice from Sexbytes ~

*You really should consider adding your popular posts here too*

Wanna Have Sex With Me? – Here’s how
All blogs that have a submission in this edition must re-post this digest from tip-to-toe on their blogs within 7 days. Re-posting the photo is optional and the use of the “read more…” tag is allowable after this point. Thank you, and enjoy!

Other

20160507_175958The Rocket was my 1.5th butt plug. I say 1.5th because technically the Fun Factory Bootie was my very first plug, but I tragically lost it after only two uses. I still have no idea where it managed to go. I looked everywhere, but I suspect it must have fallen out of my shower caddy on its way from being cleaned. Apologies to the poor soul who found my butt plug in a communal dorm bathroom. Oops. 

Butt Stuff

Woman_on_Spanking_Bench_by_MaltesteLast Tuesday (4/26), The folks of @sextalktuesday held a discussion facilitated by @taylorjmace about kink and BDSM being used as a therapeutic recovery method for those dealing with trauma. Since I have no connection to trauma and only experience depression and anxiety, I felt my thoughts about my own relationship to BDSM would be better suited for a personal blog post rather than chiming into the conversation with something off-topic.

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